Immortal Beloved in Moonlight
by Caerphilly
Summary: This story begins four decades after Moonchild, and I could'nt come up with a better title.. What happens when Mi'kha comes back after so many long years? Will she and Edward get their happily ever after?
1. Chapter 1

As I informed you, we pick up our story at the end of Moonchild.

I'm open to ideas concerning my story line although many chapters were finished before even posting Moonchild.

Who knows where this might lead?

And offcourse I've managed to work in some Native American for all of you 'shape-shifter' fans out there :D

Enjoy!!

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Chapter 1

It's been 4 decades since that appaling night in the clearing.  
The night I had to leave the one I love, to ensure his safety.  
The memory and pain of that night was still raw, a constant agony in the bleeding shreads of my heart.  
His eyes, full of despair and his terrifying cries as they tore me from his arms.  
Little Alice falling to the ground in pain, broken down by the full force of Jane's power.  
The 'gift' that created the illusion of mind numbing mental pain.  
And Esme's lovely face, marked by terror at the sight of her devastated family.  
The only thing I COULD do to save them was to turn to the slavery I so feared.  
And so I did, for 42 years I'd been their minion to oppress the vampire world.  
Continuous beatings in the early days had hardened me and I was now a shell of the woman I used to be, blood red eyes and a murderous temper.  
Off course it was to Aro's deep satisfaction, Carlisle's loving niece was now a murder machine.  
Luckily he'd never been able to grasp the actual magic that impowered me, it was still the only reason I was able to resist their well practiced methods to break one's mind.  
Memories of home had never left my heart.

But now I decided it'd been enough "Master, I'm leaving your house" I said in a low voice while I knelt at his feet.  
The Volturi were full of themselves and loved to be worshipped, I'd learned to take that to my advantage.  
I felt a familiar cold hand on my head, it was a well known gesture for me to stand up.  
Crimson eyes stared intently into mine "You wish to leave?" he said in a conspiring tone.  
My jaw tightened in reflex, I knew his games all to well "I've done everything you asked for over four decades. I am still young and wish to explore the world" I said coldly, trying not to refer to the Cullens.  
Aro's 'gift' made that very difficult, the moment he first touched me, he was able to see, hear and feel every thought my mind ever held.  
But luckily I was tought to pull up a crafty protective shield that somehow nobody had been able to detect in 4 decades.  
His thin leathery hand shook mine slowly, searching for a sign or hint referring to the Cullens.  
After a long and tence moment he sighed and his narrow lips curled into an aproving smile "Well little one, I guessed it would be the right time for you to flee the nest" she mused fatherly.  
I winced internally at the sound of Carlisle's nick-name for me, but composed myself without showing any sign.  
My jaw uncleanched and I nodded once "It is" I spoke quickly.  
From the corner of my eye I could sence Marcus and Caius' growing impatience and I knew I had to keep this a very short goodbye if I ever intended on getting out.  
Aro put his hands on my shoulders "Will we see you home soon?" he demanded in a sugar sweet voice.  
I rolled my eyes towards the ceiling for a moment and sighed to make it look like I was contemplating his request "I can't promiss you that, Master. I've been home for an awfull long time. There's still so much I want to learn" I tried to make my voice sound indecisive.  
From Aro's reaction, I was sure it worked but sill I quickly added "Maybe in a few decades" and forced my lips into a casual smile.  
Within the same second I kissed his cheeks quickly in goodbye and practically flew out of the room.  
Belongings were of no importance to me, all I desired was to get home to my beloved family.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

The Cullen residance looked exactly the way I remembered, black marble stairs leading to the wide front door.  
Windows, endless windows welcoming the forbidden exposure to the sun.  
I swallowed the huge lump in my throat and I rubbed my chest lightly in an attempt to calm down the flutter in my aching heart.  
I inhaled deeply "This is it.." I muttered to myself as I commanded myself towards the front door.  
My left hand moved instinctively to knock on the door, but hessitated.  
What if they'd moved on without me, forgotten me completely.  
I shook my head to clear it from any thoughts that could possibly cause a panic attack.

The sudden knock of my hand made me jump, but nothing happened so I moved my finger towards the loud doorbel.  
Movement became visible behind the door and my heart bounched hyperactively in my chest when a small pixie-like girl opened it hessitantly.  
Her eyes grew wide with shock as she saw me "Mi'kha!!" she yelled exuberantly.  
I smile widely as I trew my arms around her "Ow Alice" I mumbled as the hot wet tears came in a flood.  
Within the tenth of a second there was another set of freezing arms around us "Ow little one, you're home" Esme mused emotionally.  
She examened my face carefully and kissed my cheeks thouroughly "You're safe now.. I'll call Carlisle" she spoke swiftly as she left behind a swirl of wind.  
Alice guided me inside "Are you home for good?" she asked me hessitantly.  
Here was a certain waver in her voice, a kind of caution I hadn't noticed before.  
I laughed out loud and ruffled her hair "Yes! I'm home for good".  
This seemed to put her at ease and she gestured for me to sit at the dining table.  
Suspision rose up in me, though I didn't know the reason of her reserved posture, I had a really bad feeling about this.  
My stomach twisted heavily and my heart tore back into the same shreads it had been for fourty years.  
Loud footsteps made me jump up from the chair "Mi.." a rolling voice huffed.  
I smiled at the brawny boy, standing in the doorway "Hello Emmet" I chuckled.  
He flashed me a boyish grin I'd missed so much "Hi sis" he snickered while grasping me into his familiar chokehold.  
My hands padded his shoulders lightly and he slowly let go "Jazz!!" he boomed through the kitchen "Look what I caught here".  
Jasper appeared a few metres above us, climbing in through the glass roof, situated above the dining table, and graceously hopped off.  
He looked me over exameningly "Wow.. you look.." he said hessitantly.  
I pulled up one sarcastic eyebrow "Like you when you left Maria?" I chuckled lightly.  
He sighed in relieve at my joke "No sis, you actually look worse.." he said almost in a whisper, cautiously looking over the scars that told my obvious tale.  
He shook his head with bewildered eyes "What have they done to you?" he whispered while he pulled up my sleeve and inspected my left fore arm.  
I shrugged "Ah well, I survived" I said nonchalantely while I inconspicuously muffled my sleeve back down.  
From the corner of my eye Rosalie entered the room and broke her stride immediately when she noted my presence.  
Wide blue eyes stared at me as she stifeled towards me "You're back.."she whispered as her lean fingers cautiously touched my right shoulder.  
"Yes Rose, I'm back" I whispered while I took a slow step towards her.  
Her lips moved as if to speak but I shook my head and hugged her gently.  
I knew she probably felt terribly guilty for accidentally breaking our protective shield fourty years ago.  
Her body trembled and I stroked her hair and soflty shushed "I'm here and I am fine Rose, you did what you could in the clearing" I whispered in a calming tone.  
Suddenly her head shot up "I shoud have protected us" she stated.  
I shook my head with a soft expression in my eyes "No sister, you did all you could for me" and winked at Emmet to take over.  
He walked towards her and took her arms from me "Come on Rose, she is fine. And you have no blame what so ever" he mused as he lifted her up and carried her upstairs.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

We sat at the dinnertable for hours, talking about what they'd been up to.  
And I explained a little to jasper of my time in Volterra, how they treated me and the Volturi's exelent Military system.  
Alice had left a while earlier to pick up Carlisle at the hospital and to go shopping for human food.  
She'd beemed at the thought of shopping, even if it was for groceries.  
Esme swirled graceously into the room with a tray, containing herbal tea and biscuits.  
My eyebrows shot up in surprise and she smiled exuberantly "I don't know why but I bought them last week" she spoke cheerfully "somehere deep down I must have known.." she smiled.  
I winked at her "That's why you're the mother. You're good at it" I laughed quietly as I kissed her cheek.

Jasper was not about to let our subject slip "I am sorry, but I'd like to know some more.. if you don't mind.."he trailed off sugestively.  
I inhaled deeply and opened my mouth to speak when the back door opened, ruffling my hair.  
My head turned around instinctively and I saw a beautiful woman with strawberry red hear that hung down her thighs.  
She had a slender figure that would make a super model cry with envy, and behind her a young man followed.  
I felt Jaspers cold, strong arms on my forearm as my mind registered the warm amber eyes.  
Touseled reddish brown hair made me realise this was Edward, my Edward, and he was holding hands with another woman.  
My mouth fell open and I turned to stare at Jasper.  
He looked down at the table, in a guiltfull pose "I'm sorry" he whispered almost inaudible.  
I swallowed a lump in my troat as my left hand clamped my chest, trying to keep my insides from ripping.  
A few stifling footsteps sounded muffled behind me "Mi'kha?" a hoarse familiar voice whispered behind me.  
I shook my head, unable to speak or move.  
The woman at his side tapped her feat impatiently and she cleared her troat to regain his attention.  
A wave of anger washed over me as I carefully lowered my protective shield, releasing the full force of my pain on Edward.  
He gusted out air in shock, dropping to his knees behind me "Mi'kha" he said pleading.  
I didn't react and focussed intently on my breathing while I skillfully recreated my safety zone.  
"Tanya!" Carlisle's demanding voice sounded from the hallway "Get Edward upstairs" he compelled when she didn't react.  
He snapped his fingers while he ran towards the chair next to me and sat down.  
His cold hand touched my face hessitantly "My little one, is it really you?" he asked with the tone of a broken man.  
I turned my eyes toward him, and my eyes were cold and empty.  
The sight of his trustfull hazel eyes and his transluscent pale skin brought me back to earth.  
My eyes grew wider and I drew a heavy breath while Tanya struggled with Edward in the background.  
Carlisle eyes shot to Edward for a tiny second, giving him an acusing glare "Go upstairs son, there is another time and place for this" he said calmy.  
I wrapped my arms around him, breaking down in absolute sorrow "I'm sorry.. I shouldn't have come.. But I missed you so" I managed to blabber.  
His hard arms embraced me lovingly "No, it's a good thing you came. This we can solve, my little one. At least you're safe and home now.."he mused gently in my ear.  
We sat like that for about half an hour, crying in relieve to be reunited.  
When I finally calmed down I sighed deeply once and then smiled weekly "Thank you, I'm actually not that sad to be here" they chuckled silently.

I wiped my teary face with my hands "Could I maybe take a shower? It's been quite a journey, both in miles and emotions"I examened my hands, smudged with mascara.  
Alice laughed in her familiar thrilling sound "Come on, I'll run you a bath and we can talk girly stuff" she chattered as she pulled me upstairs.  
Carslisle winked at me :'We'll talk later: he spoke in his mental voice.  
I returned his wink and formed a silent thank you with my lips before Alice pulled me around the corner.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

It's been weeks since my arrival and as I wasn't used to sleep anymore I found myself well adjusted to the vampire household.

Alice had taken me shopping twice because I hadn't taken anything from Volterra but the clothes on my back.

"You can't walk around naked" she'd stated with a reprimanding glare and I knew my sister well enough to know I had lost this battle.

As a favour to me, Edward was banned to the cottage in the woods so I could settle back down in a matter of hours, Jasper and Emmet had moved all my stuff out of Edwards room and made Carlisle's office into an emergeny guest room.

It was nice to have my own sanctuary, even though every item I owned now held Edwards horribly desirable scent.

He had begged Carlisle to let him talk to me, but I wasn't ready for a confrontation.

But I must admit it took me more than a little strength not to go to his room, clouded with memories that seemed to have taken place in another era.  
And so it was that I came out of the library with my nose burried deep in Dante 's Divine Comedy, when I walked right into the dark wooden door that lead to the third floor.  
I rubbed my head, feeling the bump that was already forming "Aw..." I muttered astonished as the door caught my attention.  
The force of my head had caused it to open, revealing the staircase behind it.  
My curiousity won from my worries and my left hand grabbed my aching chest as my feet dragged me forward.  
Every single step up the staircase felt heavy, as if my feet were made of concrete.  
The draft in the hallway pushed open the door in front of me and I saw the familiar dark wooden floor.  
My eyes wandered around the room, his room and now also her room, and memories of a long lost love crushed my pounding chest like wallnuts.  
I inhaled his rich, sweet scent and my knees collapsed, landing me on the side of the wide metal bed.  
My eyes wandered for hours as I figured out what to do...

Should I leave ?

Or do I stay and try to live with the fact that my immortal beloved found another?

Should I talk to him? And if so, what could I possibly say?

I quickly decided I'd let Edward do the talking, I mean.. wasn't I the one who endured years of slavery for his safety?  
And wasn't he the one that broke his promiss to me?  
Or was I being unfair and should I be happy for his newfound happiness.  
I shook my head to clear my mind and I found that my cellphone was already in my hand.  
Absently, my fingers touched the screen and the phone was answered before it could even ring.  
There was a long silence on the other end of the line "Edward?" I whispered hessitantly.  
"Yes" Edward replied curtly.  
This was a reaction I hadn't expected "I am ready to listen if you still want to talk" I said sternly, answering his cold tone.  
The phone went dead immediately, before I was able to ask him to come alone or say where I was.

Within a few minutes, he appeared in the doorway.  
I stood up slowly while all my previous intentions crumbled at the very sight of him "Hi" I breathed.  
He rushed to my side, keeping just inches between us "I thought I'd never see you again" he whispered while his eyes scanned my face panickly.  
I turned my face from him, trying not to drown in his warm liquid eyes "Yes, well.. here I am, as I promissed" I said, sudenly sounding very hoarsely.  
His cold fingers touched my jaw, sending an electric current through my body "Yes, here you are" he spoke gently as he turned my face back towards his.  
My lips suddenly felt dry and I licked them instinctively, his irisses focussed on the gesture like a cat spotting a mouse.  
His scent was overpowering and I suddenly felt like hot wax in his hands, I needed an escape.  
I raced across the room, leaving nothing but a wave of air in his arms "Stop it Edward" I growled softly while I gasped for air.  
he dropped his arms and dropped on the bed with a sigh "Then what do you want from me?" he asked.  
Anger boiled up in me "Excuse me? What do I want from you? Edward you promissed yourself to another woman.. What am I supposed to do?" I said fiercely.  
His head snapped up at me "Am I not what you came here for?" he asked in a daring tone.  
I growled once and then tried to sompose my voice "you are.. I mean were, but you are a taken man now" Before I knew it, his body was closer than it had been in more than four decades "Am or were?" he said in a seductive, alluring tone.  
I could feel his cold temperature mingle with my human warmth and my body shivered, both by the chill as by the sudden wave of passion that washed over me "You're seducing me.. Stop it, what do you want from me?" I groaned softly.  
He chuckled conspiratively while his icey breath raised the little hairs at the back of my neck "I've waited so long for your return, love. And I don't intent on letting you go" he mused while his lips gently brushed my neck.  
Beyond miracle, there was still one trace of willpower left in me, and I trew myself across the room.  
My legs collapsed from under me and I gasped heavily for air "You have a mate" I snarled.  
He froze, a rigid marble statue and I tried to pull my self up by the window-sill "I will not be that kind of woman. It's her or me.." I snapped at him while I stumbled towards the staircase.  
I was dazed when I stumbled down the staircase and found my room down the hall.  
My bed looked comforting and I crawled under the covers, curling up in a ball while hot tears streamed down my face.  
The pain of him being so close to me while he belonged to another, was unbearable.  
It ripped through me like the hot lashes of a leather whip that were still a vivid memory.  
My head pounded heavily and my lungs felt like they were made of the purest acid as air burned it's way up my trachea.  
I rocked my shaking body, untill the scenery clouded and I finally fell asleep.

A cold hand stroked my hair and unvoluntarily, I opened my eyes.  
Alice was sitting on the bed beside me "Hi" she whispered "You've been asleep for days".  
I groaned and turned around so I wouldn't have to face her.  
She let out a deep sigh "You should eat something Mi'kha" she encouraged me.  
I pulled the heavy grey quilt over my head "I'm not going downstairs" I warned her.  
Her strength was too much for me at this point, and she effortlessly pulled back the quilt "If you're not in the shower by and hour, I'll help you" she warned.  
I shook my head heavily "Nu-uh!" I yelled.  
There was no reaction and when I finally looked up at her, she was alredy gone.  
I knew my sister well enough that that meant there was no other option, no discussion possible.  
My eyebrows furrowed and my lips curled into a stubborn pout "I hate it when she does that" I muttered to myself as I tore myself from the safety of my bed and walked towards her pearly white bathroom.  
Even though I really didn't want to admit it, the hot water felt nice and did wonders on my capricious mood.  
That lasted about half an hour, untill I saw the dress Alice'd laid out for me.  
It had a spagetti strapped top and ended about 15 centimetres above the knee "Since when do people wear undergarments during the day" I grumbled to myself as I wiggled myself into the silky gown.


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

"I made you scones" Alice said in high spirits as I stumbled down the stairs.  
I raised my eyebrows with a smile "you did? To what do I owe this" I spoke as light heartedly as I could manage.  
She chuckled and swirled theatrically out of the kitchen with a silver tray.  
The scent hit me, and my stomach snarled heavily "oh.. I'm so hungry" I chuckled in surprise, rubbing my stomach.  
Alice sat down and laughed while she gestured towards the tray with fresh baked scones "Dig in" she winked.  
I chuckled again mischievously "Now, watch ME hunt" and quickly tore of a big chunk.  
We giggled together while I ate my breakfast, talking about trivial things.  
When the insignificant topics were covered, I sighed "Alice.." but she broke me off midsentence.  
She placed her finger agains my lips "You don't have to talk about it, I understand.." she breathed almost in a whisper.  
I shook my head once, removing her finger "No, it's ok.. I need to talk about this.. The pain is getting to much to bare"  
my voice sounded feeble and broken as my eyes filled with tears.  
My heart started aching and I instinctively clutched the top of my dress, as I tried to push back the burning moisture behind my eyes "I shouldn't have tried to talk to him.. He tried to seduce me.." I mumbled as the images of my last encounter with Edward rushed by.  
Alice gasped "He did what?" she asked confused.  
I nodded "He was so close, kissing my neck.. I thought I was going to lose it.." I whispered embarrased.  
She shook her head, swaying her pixie locks "What the hell is he doing? You've been so gracious about all of this.. And he tried to seduce you?" she muttered absently while gently rubbing my back.  
Hot, wet tears ran freely down my blushing cheeks "What am I supposed to do Alice? Please, tell me.. This is too much for me" I pleaded.  
Her lips pouted and she stood up firmly "I am going to talk to him, right now" she growled fiercely.  
Little Alice was angry at her brother, because of me.. And he was about to find out how I felt "No!" I said in a hoarse whisper.  
She pulled me up by my hands and locked her honey eyes on mine "you can't go on like this.. And neither can he" she pressed.  
"Neither can he? What do you mean Alice?" I muttered quickly, surprised by her choice of words.  
A deep sigh escaped her perky lips "Mi'kha.. do you really think Edward forgot about you for one second?" she said sternly.  
I didn't understand, hadn't he chosen someone else?  
My face must have given away my confusion, because she smiled softly "He never took your ring off in all those years. And he never stopped loving you Mi'kha" she mused softly.  
My heart skipped a beat at the sound of her words and my mouth shot open in shock "But.. how?" I breathed.  
Her eyes turned absent for a long moment "The pain of losing you would have consumed him.. And Tanya was more than interested, that was obvious. We kinda.. Trapped him into accepting her" she spoke almost inaudible while she looked away in shame.  
I took her hand and she turned away from me "You don't understand Mi'kha.. We were the ones who doubted you were alive. Not Edward, never Edward" she whispered in pain.  
My hands moved towards her shoulders and I turned her back to me, so she'd look me in the eyes.  
We stood like that for a while, and she looked so terribly guilty that it made me feel guilty.  
I sat down in my chair "So this means... Edward still loves me?" I whispered astonished "He would've never broken his promiss to me if it hadn't been for you?" Though I didn't look up at her, I heard her nod in agreement "Yes.. If I'd known.. We would've never..." she stammered.  
My body felt heavy and suddenly I felt the weight of all my long years on this earth "I don't blame you Alice.. You wanted your brother to be happy, I understand it was unbearable to watch him suffer the way only Edward can" I muttered in a low, weary voice.  
She grinned sarcasticly "Yes, he is good at it" she chuckled unwillingly.  
I took her hand and stared into bitter topaz eyes "Alice, I really don't blame you.. Nor Edward at the knowledge of this fact"  
I said in a low and steady voice.  
She winced "Does this mean you're not going to talk to him again?" she said with a tone I couldn't grasp.

I didn't understand this reaction "Yes, it does. He chose Tanya, and she picked up the pieces I left.. She deserves to be with him" I explained with raised eyebrows.

Alice glared at me "I f you won't, then I will" she growled while capably avoiding my plead for Tanya's case in the matter.

Within a second she kissed my cheek and flew out of the back door, leaving nothing but a gust of wind. 


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6

I'd been up and down the house all day, crabby because Alice'd decided to take the matter out of my hands.. again!  
What was she about to say to Edward?  
Sorry I screwed up, the one you love is alive after all, oh and by the way she loves you more than life itself?  
Come on home and reunite, she's waiting?  
Did I want that to happen, Edward ruining Tanya's eternal existance to be with me?  
My thoughts were blazing like a whirl wind, so I decided to go for a walk in the woods.  
I jumped barefeet over the stream that was situated south of the mansion and raced into the vast misty forest.  
A light diffusion of moisture covered me, soaking my dress into a cool cover to my sweating body.  
The blinding speed caused by my supernatural strength seemed to clear my mind and the black rubble that was once my heart healed the slightest bit.  
I skidded to a halt and realised I had entered my favourite miniature beach, the small clearing that caused my union with Carlisle and my love affair with Edward.  
It seemed to welcome me and a feeling of familiarity crossed my heart.  
My feet dragged towards the rock and I landed on it with a soft thud "Mother goddess, with all your grace.. Are you here?" I whispered while I tried to relax.  
Years had passed since I'd contacted the lady of the lake, the Wickan Goddess I worshipped.  
Minutes passed, untill a common swallowtail fluttered around me before she landed on my left hand.  
I smiled and my broken heart felt warmer "Thank you for coming mylady" I muttered quietly as I raised the butterly up.  
The wind flared up and caried musical voices into the air "My dear child, do not despair. I would find you anywhere" I smiled as the warm breeze caressed my skin "Thank you for your kindness, my lady. Would you enrich me with your wisdom, maybe?" I spoke softly while internally wincing at my mediocre riming skills.  
A ringing laughter swirled around me "My dear child.. The time of your blackest night will soon come to an end, and rays of sun bring light with purpose and intent, so you will regain love and your heart will mend"  
The wind dropped as sudden as it came and when I looked back at my raised hand, the butterfly was gone.  
"She came to me" I whispered with closed eyes, enjoying the intensity of her presence.  
The sand ruffled behaind me and I shopt up from the rock with a vicious snarl.  
I rushed towards my attacker in a crouch.. It was Edward, and I immediately dropped my hostile composure.  
His eyes were wide and he stood rigid as a rock "Sorry" I muttered as I sat back on the rock casually.  
He cleared his troat as he relaxed his muscles "Alice said you were here" he spoke softly as he slowly walked towards me.  
I gestured for him to sit down next to me as I stared intently into the clear water of the creek on my right.  
"What else did she say?" I asked sugestively with a sacratic tone.  
His eyes bored into me but I refused to look at him, I knew the effect of his eyes on me very well.  
When, after a long while, he still hadn't anwered my question, I knew there was no other way than to give in.  
I exhaled heavily and saw his hessitant eyes examining me intently.  
My head nodded involuntarily and I hopped of the large rock and landed my behind into the sand next to him.  
"She told me a little.." I wavered "Of how you suffered when I.. left" I whispered in a raw voice.  
His lips puckered the way her always did when he worried and he turned his face towards the creek.  
My fingers gently touched his perfectly smooth jawline to turn it back to me, and a familiar current ran through me.  
He closed his eyes and swallowed heavily "I did, it was the darkest night of my existance.. Before you, Mi'kha, my life was like a moonless night. Very dark, but there were points of light and reason. And then you shot across my sky like a meteor. Suddenly everything was on fire; there was brilliancy, there was beauty. When you were gone, when the meteor had fallen over the horizon, everything went black. Nothing had changed, but my eyes were blinded by the light. I couldn t see the stars anymore. And there was no more reason for anything" he said in all earnest.  
At that moment, all the walls I'd built in 4 decades crumbled and there was nothing more I wanted than him.  
He stared at my pained eyes with torn black eyes "Edward.. What happened?" I gusted out in pain.  
His mouth opened as if to speak, but he wavered.  
Cool fingers touched my flushed cheeks, gently sweeping away my tears "I made myself think it was time to move on..But I couldn't bring my self to stop thinking of you, seeing your face in my mind, every second that you were away. When I told myself that I should forget about you, it was the very blackest kind of blasphemy" he whispered.  
I stood up swiftly and started pacing, trying to get my thoughts to make sence.  
He waited patiently untill I turned towards him "Please, tell me something.. What am I supposed to do with this info" I asked in a broken, hessitant voice "You are still unavailable to me" I accused.  
He glared at me and his jaw flexed "I tell you that I love you, and this is how you react?" he snapped.  
I nodded sternly, folding my arms around my chest and he huffed sarcastically "I didn't actually have the strength to do anything after Alice came to talk to me.. I needed to find you, as soon as possible" he grumbled as he paced towards me.  
His cold hands pulled my wrists, breaking my vexed posture and my anger slowly melted like wax.  
I tried to break free but he didn't let go my restraints as he locked his smoldering eyes into mine.  
One heavy exhale it took for me to feel the familiar dry ache in my throat I'd longed for more than four decades "What do you want from me Edward? You know you're the sole reason for my survival.. If it hadn't been for you, I'd commited suicide ages ago" I muttered, suddenly very aware of his presence.  
He winced at my remark and then pulled my arms around his waist and hugged me fiercely.  
This was it, I had the man I wanted in my arms after so many years and my legs collapsed from under me.  
Strong arms lifted me up from the wet sand and he sat us on the rock while cradling me "This can't be happening.. I must be dreaming.." I mumbled faintly as my fingers traced the lines of his magnificent marble face.  
He smiled a loving smile and lifted me up "You re not asleep, and you re not dead. I m here, and I love you. I have always loved you, and I will always love you" he mused emotionally in my ear.  
The hard, ashy shells crumbled from around my heart and I wrapped my arms around his neck and my legs folded around his waist.  
Our fingers entwined and he smiled my favourite crooked smile "Are you sure?" I asked him while my heart bounched so effortlessly that it hurt "I mean, I wouldn't stand in your way if you found happiness with Tanya" I pressed.  
He shook his head and kissed me fiercely "My heart hasn t beat in many years, but this was different. It was like my heart was gone,like I was hollow. Like I d left everything that was inside me with you" he mused while his lips brushed my neck, causing little bumps on my skin.  
I shivered with a pleasurable chill "Everywhere I'm looking now, I'm surrounded by your embrace, Baby, I can see your halo. Hit me like a ray of sun, Burning through my darkest night, You're the only one that I want, Think I'm addicted to your light, I swore I'd never fall again, But this don't even feel like falling, Gravity can't forget, To pull me back to the ground again" I sung softly while my left hand tousled his bronze hair.  
He sighed contently "I've missed that voice" and he kissed me passionately while he pulled me tighter to him.  
I could feel his growing enthousiasm and as much as I yearned for him, I knew we had to get back to reality.  
Gently, I pushed him away from me "Edward" I sighed "We have to get back to reality" I cringed at the sound of those inevitable words.  
He nodded while his arms wrapped around me "I know.. I wish we could stay here forever" he whispered feverishly.  
I had to fight against the intoxication of his voice, my body burnt for him and my mind was trying very hard to convince the opposite of what had to be done.  
"If you want to be with me, you should really talk to Tanya as soon as possible" my voice sounded untouched but my muscles tensed noticably.  
He rubbed my arm and turned me around to face him, there were traces of doubt "I know.." he wavered "Will you wait for me?"  
he suddenly sounded actious, almost like he was affarid I would change my mind.  
I sighed ones "No, I think I'll go home and take a shower. I'm all sticky" I said with a sugestive wink while standing up.  
The full lips I craved touched mine once more "I'll see you soon" he winked and then was gone. 


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7

I stood in the shower, trying to put my thoughts in the right order.  
Had he chosen me now? Was he breaking up with Tanya.. or.  
I gusted out air, trying desperately to release the stress from my tense body.  
The bathroom door opened slightly "Can I come in?" Alice's thrilling voice sounded enthousiasticly.  
"Sure" I said while I pulled back the shower curtain and turned my back towards the entry.  
She was bouncing impatiently as she always was when she wanted gossip "And? How did it go?" she blabbed out without any introduction.  
I chuckled at her curiosity "alice, calm down!" I laughed and she huffed "I am calm.. Did you talk to Edward or not?" she chattered while hopping on her left leg.  
There was no way to delay "Yes, we talked" I muttered and she pulled back the shower cutain with wide nervous eyes "And?"  
she mouthed.  
A deep sigh escaped my lungs "I don't know.. words of love were uttered, but he was hessitant when I pressed him to talk to Tanya" I mumbled restlessly.  
After all, I wasn't sure of his intentions or his motives.  
Alice beemed at my words and she cheered "Then it'll all be allright" she moved around the room like a ballerina.  
My hands raised instinctively "Hold on, Alice.. I don't know anything yet! What does the future tell you?" I asked curiously.  
Sudden turbulence hit me, what if he wouldn't break up with Tanya?  
If HE'D gone back on his words.  
The memory of a promis rose up in me, If that was the case I promissed not to stand in his way.  
The hot water washed away my silent tears as I heared Alice gasp absently from behind me.  
Her eyes were foggy and here porcelan face struck by a fear that soon shifted into anger.  
My heart was chrushed with a blinding pain and my lungs jammed, unabling me to breath as I realised what she'd seen.  
She looked at me with apologetic eyes as I slowly sunk onto the cold bathroom floor.  
A thick haze covered me although I could faintly recognise Alice's panicky stare "He left me again" I whispered inaudibly.  
My shin tingled and I saw cool hands lift me from the floor "This can't be happening" I mumbled as I felt a warm, soft fabrik against my skin.  
I have to get back to reality, my family shouldn't suffer because of my pain.  
Gradually, I recoginsed the large white towel wrapped around my shoulders and the temperature of the room.  
Alice's lovely features grew more distinct by the second "I'm sorry, I shouldn't overreact like that everytime he does that to me" I mumbled apologeticly.  
I stood up traightening my back while I folded the towel around my body "What are you doing?" Alice whispered hessitantly.  
"To get dressed" I said sternly as I turned my back to her.  
Her icey fingers touched my left shoulder "Will you be ok?" and I nodded once before I left the bathroom with heavy feet. 


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter 8

When I was dressed and ready to go downstairs, I sat on my improvised bed.  
I desperately longed for my mother and I folded my legs to meditate.  
The little white cottage from my early days came into view and the homey scent of fresh herbs caused a gaping hole in my chest.  
The wooden door was open, as if she expected my return and I quietly walked inside.  
As always, Elvira sat in her rocking chair, nitting and humming familiar tunes "Welcome, little one" she mused without looking up.  
I closed my eyes in an appempt to push back the tears "Hello mother" I said in a raw voice.  
Her emerald green eyes examined me carefully as she senced my mood "Are you unhappy, my child?" she asked as she reached her wrinkly hand towards me.  
I sat on the stove next to her and padded her fingers "I know I don't have to explain" I breathed on edge.  
She nodded "Yes, I know" and stood up.  
I did the same and she put her hands on my shoulders "Remember the wise words of the goddess, Mi'kha. Her love comes in mysterious ways" she mused in a low voice.  
What could she have meant?  
She said the dark days were over.. wasn't this the darkest of hours I had seen?  
I nodded involuntarily "It's just.. I don't know how much more of this I can take" I stammered.  
Elvira stroked my hair gently "You will learn in time" she said motherly as she picked up the frequence of my pain.  
Time.. time I have enough of but this was too much to bare.  
Her emerald eyes were sharp "You should go back. I he does decide to stay with the other woman, he's not worthy of your affection.." her voice crackled and I knew she was hiding her true feelings from me.  
My smile was proud as I told her "You are a good mother to me" and she kissed my cheek lightly "So is Esme, she suffers more than any of you know. She's worried about you child" she mused admirably.  
"I will" I whispered before I heared a knock on my bedroom door.  
My visualisation was broken and my mother was gone, leaving me with the endless hollow of her absence.  
My arms folded across my chest "Yes?" I said sternly while I dropped my torso on the matrass.  
Alice peeked into the room "I'm sorry, I got a little worried..Were you with your mother?" she mumled apologetically.  
I nodded and she raised her hands "I"m sorry for the interruption. I'll leave, just thought you wanted to know Edward is on his way" she rattled quickly.  
My lips pressed into a hard line and I winced internally "Then I'll come down with you" I growled.  
She took my arm and we darted down the stairs "I'll be fine Alice, no temper problems here"  
Her eyes grew dark and she glared at me "I know, but I might have some" .

My entire family sat in the livingroom, anctiously waiting for my arrival and they all looked at me with apologetic eyes.  
I glared at them with a hard grin "Ow come on, I'm practically getting used to Edwards rejection by now" I joked sarcasticly while I nonchalantely landed into the red leather armchair.  
Emmet flashed his boyish grin "Well, that means we have to come up with another gig then.. This one's getting old" he winked amiably "And besides, I think he's being really stupid" he mused semi-seriously.  
Rosalie glared at him and he shrugged "What? I'm right aren't I?" he reacted to her silent scoff.  
Alice pouted obstinately "Yes you are!" she stated.  
I raised both my hands to silence them "Stop it, both of you! You don't have to choose between me and your brother, you hear me? Behave when he gets here" I pressed and they ignored me stubbornly.  
The sliding door towards the veranda opened and Edward entered, followed my a gleaming Tanya.  
She glared at me with a wide grin, full of gloating contempt and I could see Emmets muscular arms flex from the corner of my eye.  
Edward looked at me with pained eyes "Hi" he mouthed inaudible and I looked at him with icey cold eyes.  
My insides shriveld at the sight of him, still with the other woman.  
All our declarations of love had meant nothing to him, he had made his choice.  
My fangs grew and my saphire eyes were blood red when I was able to open them, it gave away the full force of the pain I endured.  
The human form I had clung to so desparately in the past, was soulless in this future.  
My reason for living had excaped me, rejected me in all forms and I snarled viciously as he reached his arms towards me "Don't touch me" I reprimanded while a jerked away my arm.  
His mouth fell open and his entire being pleaded "Please Mi'kha" he whispered with a dry throat.  
I shook my head "you don't get to ask me for anything anymore" I growled heavily from between clenched teeth.  
He dropped his hands in defeat while Carlisle came into view "Are you alright Mi'kha?" he spoke clamly as he touched the small of my back.  
"Never better" I snapped, locking my eyes in Edwards.  
I dropped all the walls that protected my loved ones from the wave of agony I endured at that moment.  
His eyes grew wide as he felt my suffering, and he cried out in mental pain.  
It was a horrid sound, loud and shrill cutting deep into my broken hart.  
He dropped onto his knees and looked at me in terror "Mi'kha please" he hissed in panic.  
I smiled viciously "What comes around, goes around Edward" and I snatched my sigarettes of the table and slipped through the backdoor.

The door slid open behind me, but I wasn't able to concentrate enough to have any interest in knowing who had the bravery to come look for me.  
A soft cool hand touched my shoulder "Mi'kha?" a soft female whisper caught my destorted attention.  
My face turned involuntarily, and saw Esme's worried frown behind me, followed by a tenced Carlisle.  
I sighed "I appologize for my inexcusable behavior" I muttered while I stared into oblivion.  
They pulled up a chair and sat down at the table I was leaning against.  
I pulled my sunglasses from the top of my head, covering my blood red eyes before I sat down with them.  
My shaking hands figetted nervously as I waited for them to speak.  
Carlisle cleared his troat and pinched the bridge of his nose the way he always did when he worried.  
"Should I leave?" I whispered in pain as I continued staring at the table.  
They had been silent since we'd taken our place at the table but Esme's lovely features stiffened at my words "No!" she hissed pleading.  
Carlisle shook his head "No my dear, that's not the answer" he said in a low voice.  
My incoherent thoughts whirled "Then what is? I refuse to punish Edward for his choice but I doubt I'll be able to live with this" my voice crackeled.  
Esme's eyes shot from me to Carlisle and back, but she waited.  
He looked up at me "You are a part of this family, just as Edward is" he said with a father's determination.  
I looked at beloved aunt and she nodded in agreement, but this was no solution "Then what am I supposed to do?" I said,  
staring into the misty forest, longing for it's anonimity.  
This time, it was Esme who spoke "It doesn't look like Edward is too happy with his choice. He's hurting.. Empty. The same way he did when you.. left" she said while she raised her hand at her mate "No love, this must be said"  
He shrugged "We shouldn't mingle in their relationship" he said, speaking like I wasn't there.  
My hands clenched into fists "Excuse me! I am present you know!" I snapped and then sighed "I'm sorry, It's just.. I don't know what to do about this" I whispered through my teeth "I just know Edward made his choise, he chose Tanya and there's nothing I can do about that" my voice broke as I realised my words.  
Esme reached her hand towards me and I took it gladly, taking every comfort I could bare "I think you should talk to him"  
she pressed softly as she stroked my hand lovingly.  
I shook my hand heavily "Oh no, not that. He'll just tell me he loves me before he takes it back" I hissed.  
Carlisle stood up and bent down beside me "I could mediate, if you want.. We'll talk together. You, me and Edward"  
I rolled my eyes and huffed sarcasticly "If you think it'll make any difference.." I shrugged obstinately "He doesn't love me anyway" I continued with dark eyes.  
The hole in my chest grew wider, oozing bile into the gaps of my festering heart.  
He looked at me sincerily "I personally don't think he's lying to you. He spent a long time thinking you were dead, Mi'kha.  
He was a broken man for many, very long years.. and then, you stood on our doorstep.. It's confusing to him" he said with a frown.  
I nodded absently as I digested his words "I understand.. Maybe it's good, to talk with your mediation. I just, if it's not too much to ask, I'd like it to be without Tanya" but Carlisle raised his hand to silence me "Off course" he said matter of factly "This is between you and Edward" I leaned my head in my left hand "Ok then, one more try.. It's not like this can get any worse" I muttered.  
Carlisle nodded once and walked towards the backdoor, Esme pulled her chair towards me "It'll be fine child" she mused as she stroked my hair.  
We sat in silence for a long moment and when I looked back at her my eyes were anctious "Are you sure about this?" I muttered hessitantly as I nerously scratched my ear.  
She nodded and smiled at me, a warm and assuring smile.  
We stood up simultaneously and she took my hand to guide me inside "Here goes nothing" I mumbled as I looked through the wide window, seeing Alice's assuring smile.


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter 9

Alice darted towards me as I slid back the door to close it "Hi"she mouthed quietly.  
I nodded once while taking a deep breath and she locked her gaze into mine.  
"Alice, I'm scared" I said in mental conversation and she nodded in understanding, her face giving away the slightest glimpse of her concern.  
She hugged me tightly and I welcomed her affection "This is a good thing.. I can't tell you what I've seen but.. This will eventually be a good thing" she said without moving her lips.  
Jasper came towards us and put his hands on my shoulder, sending a wave of calmness and relaxation through me.  
I half smiled at him "Thanks Jazz" I muttered as I hugged him gratefully.  
He nodded with an assuring smile "Welcome Ma'am" he said in his slow Texan accent.  
Alice and I giggled as we heared a tumultuous conversation from upstairs.

Only pieces of sentences were understandable "..not going.." a high female voice hissed ".. that woman... ...loved ME.." she continued.  
The lump in my throat rose again as I heared a male voice snap back "..reason for existance.. don't want to hurt you.  
..you are not.. ..I AM going.." and then low thumps on the stairs were graphicly identifiable to our vampire sences.  
I sighed and rubbed my temples "What am I doing" I groaned as I squeezed my eyes shut "I'm tearing them appart"  
Alice and Jasper held me close to their cold bodies as I felt a heavy gust of wind, revealing Tanya in front of me.  
She snarled loudly and I pushed my siblings away from me, trying to protect them from Edward's furious mate.  
I looked nonchalantely back at her placing my hands carelessly on my hips.  
Her teeth gleamed in the fading sunlight "He's mine" she growled.  
Jasper tried to step between us but I pushed him back gently "No need bro, I got this" I said with one raised eyebrow.  
This ticked her off even more and her slender body started shaking with anger "You're right, he's yours.. But that doesn't mean you own him" I rebuted calmly.  
Her hazel eyes grew black at the sound of my words and I folded my arms around my chest.

Edward appeared at the top of the staircase and growled "Tanya, go hunting. You'll hurt somebody if you don't feed soon" he spoke in a low angry tone.  
She shot her face towards him at the same moment his gaze met mine.  
His entire posture changed and he exhaled heavily, I smiled half heartedly.  
Tanya growled and snapped her teeth at me, I clenched my jaws and took a threatening step towards her.  
Within a second, Edward was standing between us facing me "No" he said with anctious eyes.  
My shoulders shot back as Jasper grabbed hold of me, I gave Edward an intimidating glare "She snapped her teeth at me.  
Don't think I'll be so rude as to return the favour" I growled.  
Suddenly everything changed as Edward did the last thing I'd expected.  
Instead of defending his girlfriend, he gently touched my cheek, pressing his cold fingers to my burning skin.  
It sent an electric current through me and everything else seemed to disapear as I heared his velvet voice "I know you wouldn't".;  
Like my entire body recognised his beautiful face my skin seemed to melt under the constant frost of his touch.  
For one moment we were one, complete, as magnificent winter against delightlfull summer found eachother in perfect harmony. Tanya cried out deafening snarls in the background before she knocked over the solid dining table and swooshed out of the house.  
That tore me from my blissfull moment and Emmet whistled sugestively "That was interesting" he chuckled.  
My face flushed and I shook my haid to regain control as Edward cleared his throat "Yes, it was" he mused with a chuckle.


	10. Chapter 10

hey all, I know it's been a while so I'll be updating a few in the next days

Let me know what you think! X

* * *

Chapter 10

Carlisle led us to the lounge area of the living room and I sat down on the left corner of the wide leather sofa.  
Edward sat next to me and that made me a little unfomfortable.  
He's always curteous when Tanya is out of sight, but in the end he continuously chose to be with her.  
Alice and Esme shot eachother one meaningfull look at Edwards action and I glared at them with obvious irritation.  
They chuckled and Emmet folded his arms across his chest with a sarcastic grin.  
I rolled my eyes and looked expectantly at Carlisle while I utterly regretted my decision to have this conversation.  
Tanya would surely be happy about this outcome, her tantrum made sure the whole family was present the next time I found out Edward didn't love me.  
His eyes shot between me and Edward and back again "I actually have no clue what so ever to start this conversation" he muttered embarrased while a crease formed on his forehead.  
I raised my hands before heavily dropping them in my lap "Now you tell me! Uncle it's very generous of you to sugest, but I don't see how this is going to do any difference anyway" I expressed my displeasure for this envolding display.  
Edward moved next to me, uncomfortable by my statement.  
I turned to look at him and saw him figetting.. to my knowledge I'd never seem a vampire figet unless for human pretences.  
His eyes were apologetic and I felt my muscles tence "What? I'm right aren't I? You chose tanya and there's nothing anyone can say or do to change that" I said loud and irritable.  
He shifted his body so he sat opposite of me "Mi'kha.." he whispered with a defeated sigh.  
I shook my head and shot up, putting my hands on my neck in an act of uncomprehending stress "What Edward, what? Why don't you just say to them what you've shown me numorous times.." and I stretched my arms out wide in front of my relatives "He doesn't love me, he loves her"  
And I dropped them rigidly "And now I am done suffering... I am leaving!" I growled.  
I tried to turn away but an iron grasp around my arm prevented me, Edward was glaring at me "Will you slow down and shut up for one minute?" he growled loudly.  
My mouth fell open, he was fierce and glorious as he stood beside me "Dang! I love you, woman! I just don't have a clue how to break it to Tanya, she dropped her entire life for me" he yelled as all his aching stress unleashed itselff.  
Emmet and Jasper cheered loudly before they were simultaneously silenced by a gutpunch from their wives.  
He turned my body towards him and his eyes shot anctiously across my face.  
I couldn't speak, he was doing it to me again.. and now in front of our family.  
My stomach ached by the thought of this public humiliation "Don't do this to me Edward" shrieked silently "Not again, I can't take it anymore"  
His gentle fingers whiped away the tears that had apparently fallen down my cheeks "I love you" he whispered hoarsely.  
My head shook involuntarily "No.. you don't. you chose Tanya" I screeched almost inaudible.  
Black eyes bored into mine for long minutes and then he kissed me.  
His lips pressed on mine with despair, with longing and fervour.  
My entire body was consumed by his desirable kiss, his freezing temperature mixing with my heat and his lushious scent washed through all my sences.  
I resisted the longing that built up, scorching my throat as I refused to kiss him back.  
An icey hand slid to the small of my back and pulled me closer to him, pressing his stone muscular body to mine.  
I was lost, had no will of my own and my lips opened to invite his cool, wet tongue.  
My breath grew heavier as my nails dug into his hard shoulders, ripping his white button down shirt.  
Relatives coughed in the background and I was slowly pulled back to reality.  
I unwrapped my legs from Edwards waist,and I chuckeled as I realised I hadn't noticed Edward lifting me up.  
My face turned scarlet red and I stared towards the floor "Sorry" I mumbled.  
Edward chuckled beside me, wrapping his right arm around me.  
I heared a roaring laughter from across me and when I looked up I saw Emmet grin boyishly "That was almost material for an adult movie" he boomed.  
Rosalie shot him a warning glare and punched his arm.  
Alice chuckled silently with Jasper and I couldn't help but chuckle with them.  
A cough grasped my attention "Edward? What do you plan to do now?" Carlisle asked buisness like.  
I looked at him anctiously "You meant what you said?" I whispered privately.  
He smiled widely at me "Yes love, I meant every word. I love you and I want to spend my very long eternity with the delight of your presence" he mused as his index finger traced my jaw.  
He hung his right arm over my shoulder, pressing me to him "And I'll deal with Tanya as soon as she's back.." he followed for the rest to hear.  
Emmet and Jasper nodded at eachother once and Edward followed with another.  
I could guess they assigned theirselves with protective duties, after all Tanya was a strong vampire.  
She was of Russian origin and more than three millenia of age, that made her a dangerous opponent.  
"I'll take the inside of the house in case she breaks through your defences" I said as if I'd been part of their silent discussion.  
Edward eyes shot to mine "No" he said sternly but I nodded slowly.  
He shook his head fiercely "No, I will not risk you any harm" he said louder now but I put my fingers on his lips "Don't you understand? Technically speaking I'd have the most chace in defeating her.. and if I have to fight her, that means you're already gone" I muttered.  
He looked away wryly "I just got you back, I can't bare to think of losing you.. I wish there was another way" I lay my head on his shoulder "I know" I whispered as my finger traced cirkels on his chest.

"Come" Edward mused with a naughty smile as he took my hand.  
I cocked my head to the right, curious of where he was taking me.  
The lovely piano came in sight and I smiled with radiant eyes while little drops of hope cured the illness of my heart.  
My hand ruffled through the music sheet I had scattered on top of the piano "This one" I said quickly.  
It was a song I'd written for him years ago and now it finally came to use "It's for you, from Italy" I whispered in his ear.  
His eyes shot over the title page "Halo?" he said playfully surprised "That's an awkward title for a song for me" he joked and I kissed him swiftly.  
He raised one eyebrow ostentatiously "You can do better than that" he said while he put his hands on his hips.  
I grabbed his hands and dropped them on the shiny ivory keys "You have to earn it" I winked.  
Edward smiled and let out a playfull sigh "Well.. ok.. if you insist" and he turned the first page.  
With every word I sung Edward winced a little, realising my pain "It s like I ve been awakened,Every rule I had you breaking,It s the risk that I m taking,I ain't never gonna shut you out, Everywhere I m looking now, I m surrounded by your embrace.. Baby I can see your halo,You know you re my saving grace, You re everything I need and more,It s written all over your face, Baby I can feel your halo,Pray it won t fade away.." and I sat down next to him while I continued singing my love song to him.  
When he brought my balade to and end I saw Esme and Alice watch us from a distance.  
They embrased eachother, emotional by our long awaited reunion and I smiled at Edward who was staring at my face as if he trying to memorise every inch.  
My hand tremled as I reached up my fingers to trace the contours of his full lips and his mouth opened slightly.  
He shivered and closed his eyes as my fingertips continued along his jaw and up his cheekbones towards his eyes.  
My hot lips on his made him gasp before he answered my kiss feverishly.  
Although his kiss was enthousiastic, I couldn't help but sence some sort of fear "Are you sure Edward?" I whispered as my fingers touseled his russet hair.  
His breathing was slow and heavy "Yes, I've waited fourty years for your return. And although I hate to hurt Tanya, I know I can't live without you" he whispered hoarsely.  
A smile formed on his delicious lips "And I can't wait for you any longer" he mused as he brushed them against my chin.  
I chuckled while I raised my eyesbrows sugestively and inhaled to speak when Jasper entered the room in a hurry.  
Edward nodded once "I'll be back as soon as I can" he mumbled and kissed me once, long and tenderly.  
Emmet raced down the stairs and Rose, Alice and Esme came towards me "Why don't we go upstairs?" Esme said with a well practiced smile that didn't reach her honey brown eyes.  
I nodded once and took little Alice's hand to dart up the stairs, taking cover from the wrath of the woman I betrayed.


	11. Chapter 11

Chapter 11

It had been long, nerve-wrecking hours since Edward left to talk to Tanya.  
Pacing hadn't done me any good, neither had nail biting and fidgetting and I glanced around the room at my family.  
They were all sitting down or standing perfectly still, like carved out of marble in all their immortal beauty.  
The thought of my loved ones down stairs brought a familiar fear of loss back into my body.  
What if they hadn't come back because they were hurt.. or worse killed!  
Cruel visions of my beloved, kind hearted uncle in pain and a broken down Edward entered my mind and I closed my eyes in an attempt to free me of the violent mental pictures.  
Alice moved slightly looking at me withjout blinking "There is no sign of danger Mi'kha. They will all return in one piece" she said surely.  
That relaxed me slightly, if Alice had seen this it would be true.. period!  
I smiled half heartedly "Thanks Alice, I think I need a shower" I mouthed during a heavy exhale as I sttod up to walk towards her spottless white bathroom.  
My hands jerked off my clothes automaticly as I stared at myself in the mirror.  
I'd gotten used to my plain form, the one that was acceptable and I realised I looked ashen.  
"Alice! I'm using your make-up!" I yelled as I jerked open her huge drawer "And would you mind grabbing me a bottle of dragonblood from my room?" Her chuckle was easy to recognise from her bedroom and Rosalie's musical laugh was identifiable.  
Within two seconds the door opened and she threw her head around the door, ignoring my nudity "It was time you patched yourselff up" she noted wisely.  
I huffed but when I caught another glance at my reflection I shrugged in consent.  
She giggled and threw the bottle at my feet, breaking it into a thousant pieces "Be sure to clean that up now" she mused as she winked at me "I'll lay out some clothes for you" her voice trailed off as she left the room.  
I stepped into the steaming shower mumbling "yeah, yeah" and was immediately hypnotised by the calming influence of the warmt that untied the knots in my shoulders and washed away my worries.  
"I wanna hold you high and steal your pain" I sung softly "The worst is over now, and we can breath again" I hummed for a long while, all the happier songs my mind could conjure up before the water started getting cold.  
After the towels were tightly secured around my body I got to work with Alice's extensive make-up supply.  
half an hour later I swung my head around the door "This ok?" I chuckled at Alice's gasp as she softly nudged Rose.  
She laughed "Wow Mi'kha, you really took it seriously" she laughed appraising my labour.  
Alice pionted at the black satin dress hanging at the door that lead to her 'closet.  
her walk in, twelve square metres, beroom size closet.  
I giggled "Black satin, huh? I never knew you and Edward talked so accurately abut that camping trip" I winked before I snatched the dress that was again way too short for my standards.  
She and Rosalie shared a plotting grin "Anything to keep our brother.. happy" Rosalie winked with a daring tone.  
When my eyes caught the piece of lingery hanging beneath it I gasped "I'm not wearing that!" I protested.  
They stook up, both placing their hands on their hips "Wanna bet?" Rosalie growled playfully.  
I groaned "Alright, alright I get it.. Anything for your brother right?" and Rosalie pullend up her sleeves in a defiant gesture.  
My hands raised and my eyes closed with furrowed brows "Never mind, if I'm not back in half an hour.. Set up a rescue search for me" I huffed as I slumped towards the bathroom, grumbling to myself about good oldfasion corsets "At least THEY covered something up"  
I heared my sisters giggle provocatively as I tried to squeeze myslef into the torure device their called underwear.

When I was done and all the lacey ribbons had been tied I swirled to my female family members in cirkels.  
The winked at me, appraising my hard labour for beauty "You look beautiful Mi'kha" Esme sighed dreamy.  
Rosalie raised an eyebrow at her "Beautiful? She looks smoking hot" she cheered at she high five'd Alice.  
I pulled up a corner of my mouth, blazing my teeth into a wide crooked grin "I thank you ma'am" I winked as I walked passed them.  
Alice stood up quickly "Where are you going?" she asked nervously.  
I shrugged while accepting a pair of killer heels from Rosalie "I'm going downstairs.. I'm hungry and we've been sitting couped up in her all night" I said acidly as I remembered the reason.  
Esme stood up to assure me to stay but I raised one hand towards her "I'm sorry ladies, but I'm going.. I can't help but feel anctious and hessitant about Edward love for me. As much as I want it to be real, he backed out on me before" I said nonchalantely.  
Rose and Esme looked at Alice "I can't see anything right now" she shrugged and I saw that as my cue to go ahaid.  
I slid my feet into the 5 inch high strappy sandals.  
The living room was empty and I wurried to the kitchen for some food, I was dying for peanut butter.  
A spoon and some stale bread was all that was needed to make me happy at this point and I almost devoured the entire contept of the family size jar, spooning it out.  
Alice stared a me with a disgusted expression "Ugh, that looks awfull" she complained.  
I pulled the spoon out of my mouth with a popping sound "It's delish" I chuckled as she turned away from me theatrically.  
Esme laughed with me "That realy does look nasty" pulling one finger throught the delicious brown spread and sniffed it.  
Her nose wrinkeld in disgust "Sorry Mi'kha. It smells like, like.. ugh" she winced with a slight smile and I chuckled loudly when we heared the backdoors slide open.  
We all held our breath as loud, heavy footsteps came nearer, everything seemed to move in slow motion.  
Emmet came into view and Rosalie gasped "Oh, thank god" she mouthed as she gracefully hopped up and landed into his strong unharmed arms "How did it go?" she whispered while he put her feet back on the floor.  
For once, there was no trace of a grin in his features as he sat down beside me and threw me my pack of sigarettes "I suggest you light one" he said with a shallow frown and I knew this had to be serious.  
Emmet was not a man with a serious nature, he was one who was always able to find humor in the most devastating situations.  
If Rosalie was a shallow pool, Emmet was one of clear water, there was never a thought in his mind he wouldn't want to share with others.  
So in the three seconds it took me to snatch a smoke, light it up and look back at my burly brother, all the desastrous scenarios my mind could conjure up swirled by vividly.  
Carlisle hurt, Jasper hurt, Edward hurt.. or Edward leaving WITH Tanya.  
Emmet glanced around the table "Jasper and Carlisle are fine, healthy as horses" he spoke quickly, relieving his concerned sister and morning.  
They sighed heavily with relief at those words before glancing anctiously at me.  
I was well aware of what Emmet was about to say, I can't believe I was that stupid "And Edward?" I muttered with a weary voice as I pinched the bridge of my nose.  
he continued silently "He's still trying to calm her down" he muttered as he frowned into oblivion "She was about to set the cottage on fire, and we told her to go ahaid but Edward insisted on talkingher out of it. I think she's making a game his agony" he growled.  
So he did speak to her like he prommised?  
More drops of hope drizzled into the festering pains of my heart, mending the cracks one step at a time "Can I do anything for him?" I muttered staring into oblivion.  
He shook his head "I don't think so, Jasper unleashed his powers on her.. full force and she didn't even budge" he mumbled in a glum voice.  
I sighed deeply "I'll call him.. ask him to come home and let her do whatever she wants" I said absently as my fingers snatched my phone of the table.  
Emmet pushed my dialing hand gently down "Do you think that's such a good idea?" he said hessitantly.  
I shrugged "I have no idea, but maybe it's a support to him" I said contemplating and he shrugged.  
So I let my fingers push the two necessary buttons to dial my Edward.  
It rang twice before someone answered hastily "Yes?" a hard voice answered.  
A familiar lump rose in my throat "Edward?" I said in a shaken tone.  
A sigh escaped the person on the other side of the line "Yes.. I'm kind of busy now.." he pressed referring to Tanya.  
I nodded into oblivion "I know, how is she" I asked quickly, my voice marked with concern "Are you ok? Come home soon ok?"  
He cleared his throat at the other end "Not.. More than.. ANd I wish I already was" he whispered rapidly.  
I smiled widely "Love you, bye!" I cheered silently and he swiftly kissed the speaker of his cell phone before he broke the connection.  
My satisfactory grin explained the outcome of our conversation to my relatives "He wishes he was already home and kissed the speaker before he hung up" I mused blissfully "It seems this is really it" Alice bounced in her seat "WHat is what?" she thrilled and I ruffeled her hair gently "That he really chose to be with me,  
and he's not backing out on his word" I mused absently as I lay my head in my hands and stared out the window.

Two days I'd spent playing thundering Metal on my guitar, fighting with Emmet for exersize and playing the piano untill my fingertips felt raw.  
Alice almost went bananas thanks to the many times I'd asked if she'd had any visions "Cool down Mi'kha! I'm not a tv you can switch on and off" she frowned in irritation.  
I shrugged "I'm sorry sis, It just.. What's keeping him?" I complained.  
We both rolled our eyes and she laughed, I knew time was the only thing in my way now and all though it took a heavy burden of my slender shoulders, it also made me more anctios to see him.  
Feel his cool skin, touch his soft skin tingeling in the rays of late summer sun, kiss his full.  
Aargh! That wasn't helping.. better to get back to my beautiful USA Rebel Razorback, A.K.A my new guitar.  
It was a Dean, and one of Dimebag Darrel Abbott's last projects before he died.  
Along with the Signature Kerry King BC. Rich I owned, I was proud of my tribute to Thrash Metal and decided to play 'Reign in Blood".;  
She was new and had to be tuned before she'd be able to sing to Abbott's standards but she was coloured in such a perfect rebel flag that I decided not to deny her this pleasure.  
Slayer's agravated tunes flowed the last tention from my neck and shoulders instigating a yawn from the very back of my throat.  
How long had it been since I'd had a long night sleep?  
I put away the guitar and dressed for bed quickly as I suddenly felt exhaused.  
My blue satin sheets blended perfectly with the sinistre darkness and I crawled in, a white spot in a ocean of nightly shades.  
As tired as I was, I was still restless.  
Tossing and turning and unable to find comfort in my tangle of hot sheets.  
My mind wandered off to a time long ago when I woke up with a cool chill beside me and Edwards glorious face as he noticed me waking up.  
How he'd pulled me closer to his chest to cradle me and provide me with the familiar sence of frost I longed for.  
How much his absent chill felt like a devouring craving when I spent my first night in Volterra, and the ache it caused when I realised the Volturi took him from me.  
How the fact that they even had the nerve to tear me away from the one my heart yearned for so desperately, made it possible for me to gain their trust.  
The moment I realised my soul was slipping when they'd forced me to kill for them and I was broken by my never surrendering lust for blood.  
The memory of Aro's gleaming face at the sight of my crimson eyes infuriated me and I remeber the pledge to punish him for this blasphemy.  
The wounds in my heart had a memory of their own and I saw myself standing in the great halls of the vampire city, the classic marble features, but instead of beautiful they were hard and mercyless.  
Murderous eyes that were a bright crimson and a frightning smile that meant the approach of a violent death.  
Caius' hand on my arm, encouraging my thrill as his eyes gleamed with fatherly pride.  
Then something happened I didn't understand, Caius started shaking me.  
I tied to wrench my arm away from him "No! Stop it" I cried out.  
Then something else happened and my head swirled, I couldn't understand this so I shot up fast.  
Everything around me was black and totally silent "You were in the middle of a nightmare when I came in" a musical voice mused from the darkness.  
As my eyes adjusted to the darkness I senced a presence near my and my eyes shot to the left.  
The light beside my bed flicked on "Edward?" I whispered hessitantly, I wasn't sure what this dream had in store for me.  
He looked very real though, I could even feel my throat go up in flames when it caught his sweet heavy scent.  
I huffed and the Edward arcoss me smiled my favourite crooked smile "Hello love, I'm back" hesaid softly in his perfect dazzling tone.  
I sat up, folding my legs over eachother "Hi" I said in a dull voice.  
The beautiful migment of my imagination sat beside me and locked his liquid eyes into mine, they were smoldering a rich gold and I felt the room around me disapear.  
Chilly fingers caressed my face and my face bent instinctively to encourage them.  
My eyes closed, shivering pleasurably as his fingers traced slowly down towards my collar bone.  
When I forced my eyes to open he observed me with a hunger I had to miss for more than fourty years "Are you ok?" he whispered as his hands wiped briny moisture of my flushed cheeks.  
The corners of my lips turned down as I stared at my hands "I'm waiting for this dream to turn into a nightmare again" I sobbed quietly.  
He chuckled lightly and pulled me to his chest "My love, you are AWAKE" he hushed my silent sobs.  
I shook my head "If I'm not asleep.. I must be dead" I exclamated as I stared back into his confused eyes.  
Fierce lips kissed me and my nerves calmed the slightest "Is it really true" I whispered hoarsely while a new wave of fresh taers announced itself.  
He nodded slowly with a breath taking smile "Yes my immortal beloved.. I'm yours" he said slowly.  
My heart beat sped up as I tried to convince my self I wasn't dreaming "Pinch me Edward, please?" chuckled nervously as I reached my hand towards him.  
He laughed and shrugged before he gently skimped the tissue on my arm "OUch" I giggled as my eyes grew wider.  
I gasped "What happened? What took you so long?" I rattled as I took his hands in mine.  
He entwined our fingers andfiggeted for a long moment before he took a deep breath "Please.. No stories of Tanya.. I prefer to celebrate our reunion" he said in earnest before his eyes grew provokingly tempting.  
Without another word I pulled his hands with me as I lay myslef slowly down on the narrow bed.  
He shook his hands and untangled our fingers to slide his strong arms under my stretched body.  
Effortlessly he lifted me into the air, cradling me close to his fragrant body "I'm taking you home" he mused like honey as he slowly walked towards the wide staircase.


	12. Chapter 12

Chapter 12

Edward held me in an iron graps causing my hands to turn blue.  
His panick struck eyes shot over my face as he pressed me against him "No.. Don't go" he begged hoarsely as burgundy red cloakes tepped hesitantly towards us.  
Heavy salt tears washed freely down my face "I have to Edward" I shriekt pleading as my nails dug into his impenatrable vampire skin.  
Emmet snarled voilently behind me as Edward crushed his cold lips onto mine "Don't leave me" he pleaded while his entire body shook with stress.  
We both knew our most dreadfull fear had come true "I have to love, I have to keep you safe" I whispered while my brains cracked to memorize every inch of his perfect features.  
He shook his head and I put my finger on his marble lips "I have to know there's more to life than what I'm about to endure and I can't know that when you're dead. Without you, this world holds nothing of interest for me" I whispered privately as my trembling fingers traced the contours of his jawline one more time "Wait for me love, I WILL come back for you".;  
He nodded and kissed my hand fiercely.  
A cold hand placed itself on my shoulder and I knew it was time, they had come for me and all I could do was answer their 'request.  
"No!" My precious velvet voice cried out as forcefull icey arms tore me from his arms.  
My muscles strained against their restriction as they had never done before "Edward? Edward! I love you, always" I yelled across the field as Demetri and Alec struggled against my hinder.  
"Let me say my goodbyes" I snarled as I tore myself from their arms, pushing them back several metres.  
I raced back to the man I loved who'd collapsed in the fresh grass of the misty meadow.  
My shaking hands pulled him in my arms, forcing him to look at me "Edward Cullen, you are the most beautiful form of existence the word has ever held for me and I refuse to let the one and only precious thing in my life go to waste. Not if but when we meet again.." I trailed off swallowing a huge lump in my throat "Just wait or me, if you can bear" His eyes were wide and his body rigid with stress "My love, take care of my heart for I left it with you" he whispered hoarsely as he slid the leather band with his family crest on my wrist.  
"Mi'kha, it's time" a musical voice thrilled from behind me.

My eyes shot open and I inhaled heavily gasping for air.  
I glanced around the dark room as my heartbeat drummed loudly behind my ears.  
My shoulder felt cold and my head turned in the direction were chills formed on my skin.  
Edward was laying next to me for the first time sinds that terrifying might in the clearing, the night that still gave me vivid nightmares and aching insides.  
His lips formed into a luring smile, gleaming his perfect razor sharp teeth in the silver moonlight "You are safe now love" he mused softly as he pulled me back down.  
Icey fingers traced the numerous scars on my sweaty white skin "You are safe now" he repeated with inquisitive eyes.  
I shook my head "Nope, you didn't want to talk about Tanya and I don't want to talk about Italy" and I turned my back towards him.  
He gasped from behind me and I quickly pulled the quilt far over my shoulders, realising what he'd just seen.  
Long minutes passed in silence and I really wanted to know what he was thinking.  
I could feel him turn away from me and tears welled up behind my eyes "Do I disgust you?" I whispered clenching the heavy quilt in my fists.  
He shot up and turned my face towards him "No! How could you ever think that?" he said with an incredulous expression.  
I shrugged and tried to wipe my face inconspicuously.  
Offcourse he noticed the subtilest of movements and he gasped again "Are you crying?" he spat out.  
I shook my head and turned away from him again trying to push back the building sobbs.  
Cool fingers traced the outlines of my deep lashes "I didn't mean to make you cry" he muttered in a broken voice "It's just that I didn't know what to do.." he mumbled as his lips brushed the dents in my back.  
I rolled down on my stomach and he gently slid down the quilt, revealing the havoc underneath.  
My muscles tenced as he laid down beside me and caressed my tortured skin "If there was a way to trade with you, all the suffering you've had in my place.." he mused while he kissed the top of my head.  
I turned my head towards him and saw his grave eyes, he was hurting severely "No Edward, don't say that. This was my burden to bear as it was yours to stay behind. Fate chose me because I was strong enough to resist" I whispered as my fingertips relished the feel of his smooth jawline.  
I smiled warmly "Do you know it has been exactly fourty three years to the day, since I've done this?" I mused while happines filled my body.  
He smiled with me as he pulled me closer to him "Fourty three years and eight hours, my love"  
I nodded as I burried my face in his fragrant chest, inhaling the floral scent that scorched my throat like none before.  
A content growl roze from my chest "I've missed that scent.. It sets me on fire in a literal sence and it makes my head ring like little tingeling bells" I mused and he chuckled.  
His cool fingers ran through my fiery red locks "Have I ever told you what YOUR scent does to me?" he smiled secretively.  
My head shot up with expetant eyes "No.. you haven't actually".;  
He giggled again as he pushed me back down with a gentle hand "You smell like cotton candy to me. Highly sweet and it works up an appetite" he chuckled "And as it is with cotton candy, after one bite.. you want more, and more. and more" he trailed off sugestively.  
We laughed light heartedly together "Beware of addiction problems then because I'm not going anywere" I chuckeld.  
His eyes were suddenly serious and his muscles tenced "Addiction problems? You really have no idea do you?" he muttered in a buinesslike voice.  
I sat up covering my legs with my white satin pajamas and waited patiently.  
He stared at the ceiling for a long moment and then he took my hands and looked at me with embarrased crooked smile "Well.  
The first day I caught your scent.. It hit me like a wreckingball. There had been no secnt as potent as yours untill that very moment and all the humanity I'd managed to cloak myself in vanished.." he trailed off while a sence of shame marked his boyish grin.  
He touseled his hair with his right hand "I fled to Denali.. I had to figure out what to do. Was I leaving my family to ensure your safety? Or were you destined to be my 'casualty of war'?" He examined my face intently and I turned my face towards the ceiling for a long moment, digesting his words and replay the way I'd encountered those first days in Forks Highschool.  
It seemed like centuries ago, vague.. though usually my part vampire mind held it's memories clear as christal.  
Edward started figetting at my side and I quickly smiled at him in encouragement to continue.  
He nodded quickly "Anyway.. Denali.. If I'd only known that it would later cause the troubles we've seen the last couple days" he mused as he quickly pecked my cheek with smoldering hazel eyes "Right.. I'd spend like a week in the High North, pondering my options and possibilities. When I drove back to Forks I decided to ignore you like I did the rest and not get consumed by the mystery of your silent mind. After all it was of the most importance not to get involved with humans, it would mean their death and espessialy yours" he chuckeled at my questionable expression.  
He contemplated for a moment as his lips brushed the small of my neck "I suppose the best way to explain is to use a herion addict as an example. Your blood has the same desirable effect on me" he mumbled his voice muffeled by my blazing skin.  
His cold touch left a familar trace of raising hairs on my delicate white skin.  
I chuckeled "So.. I'm like your brand of Heroin?" and I laughed internally at his strange analogy.  
Edward looked at me with black hungry eyes "You are EXACTLY my personal brand of heroin" he breathed seriously.  
I couldn't help but feel uncomfortable by his seriousness "But homecome you can.." I asked but was soon silenced by Edwards eager lips "The fact that I'm resisting the wine doesn't mean I can't appreciate the bouquet" he winked seductively.  
The smile on my lips was enchanting and he laughed widely with me.  
I pulled my face slowly closer to his relishing the pleasure of the building sensual tension it accompanied.  
His muscles tenced not to give in to his sences and surrender to his craving, the craving to rediscover every inch of my delicate nearly transluscent skin.  
My soft pulsing lips brushed over his ful bottom lip and he parted them slightly, breathing out a heavy gust of icey sweet breath.  
The floral scent tingeled at the back of my throat, flairing up hot flames and I groaned softly "I've missed you so much" I muttered as my tongue traced the contour of his upper lip.  
He exhaled heavily, wrapping his arms around my waist pulling me tighter to him "If all else parished and she remained, I should still continue to be. If all else remained and she was to be annihilated, the world would turn into a mighty stranger" he whispered "I can relate to that now" he mused as he referred to a quote from Wuthering Heights.  
I nodded as I entwined my fingers in his hair to secure his face, then I winked at him and kissed him fiercely while my right hand slid along his white button down shirt, ripping off the buttons in my way.  
He groaned and slowly slid the silky straps from my shoulders, ripping the smooth fabrick at the seems without effort.


End file.
